Walking by faith

So much as happened over the last week.  It has been a busy summer of packing and house hunting, making offers, and praying God's will so we can all be together in Pittsfield.  Our family has been so blessed to have the help of our family and friends as we are transitioning.

As you know, Andrew and I had made an offer an home that had been accepted.  This home held a lot of my dreams for our family- a forever home, a home to expand in, a home to make our own.  The downfall of this 100+ year old gem was that it needed a new roof.  Upon inspection we learned that the roof had 0 life in it.  Andrew and I talked, crunched numbers (several times) and made a plan of what we could do to fix the roof situation.  We presented that to the seller.  Never in my mind did I think that the seller wouldn't split the cost of the repair.  Yet that was what happened.  On Monday she countered and it Andrew and I realized, that without her meeting us halfway, our yellow house, would never be ours.

That was a tough blow.  I really had envisioned changing that house into our new family home.  It was where I saw us in Pittsfield.  And, at that time, there were NO other prospects on our list.  I was feeling very low.  Honestly, I wasn't sure what God's plan was.  I went out with a group of friends that night and told them about it.  I can not say enough how blessed I am by these women.  Their words of encouragement give me so much strength.

Poor Andrew.  I know I haven't been easy on him through all of this.  Although our boys are so sweet, they are at ages that they both need lots of attention.  Doing that all day/all night (see our previous post about Beau's "sleeping" habits) without your partner can be exhausting.  Add to that the unknown and there have been many times that I just have not been as gracious as I am called to be.

Adding to our stress, we were closing on our home that Thursday.  We had to have all our things out- and we didn't have a place to take them!! Talk about a stressful situation.  We loaded everything Thursday morning into two, yes, two U-hauls. The LOOOONNGG ones! Our closing was scheduled for that morning but got pushed back to late afternoon, throwing off our whole day.  Andrew and I have moved before but  across town and across state are VERY different games.  There couldn't be any trips back and forth when you are driving two hours one way.

Given our situation, and me being a terrible, crazy, emotional the less than understanding wife, Andrew and secured storage units to take our things. He also had set up a home for us to walk through that he thought would be it.  To be frank, when he sent me the link, I looked at it for about a millisecond before deciding I hated it.  I just wasn't in a place that was very...open... to other places.  Ahem

Theme so far of this post- Bekah= difficult human being

After successfully closing (PTL) on our home, we began our drive over, with Andrew and my dad following behind in the two U-hauls. Two hours, by yourself, in a car, is a long time when you are used to getting about two minutes to yourself.  It gave me a lot of time to think, and a lot of time for God to start working on my heart.

When we got there, the first thing we did was go to the walk through Andrew had set up.  SHUT THE FRONT DOOR! I am just as shocked to type it- but- I LOVED IT! It was anything grandiose or overly different.  But it was homey and it was a house that Andrew and I could make our own. A ranch with room to grow after we finish the basement.  A place that I can raise our family, walk our boys to school.  A backyard big enough to add a swing set and make an area suitable for fall nights around a fire pit with family and friends.

So where are we now? We are still separated.  Most of our belongings are in a storage unit two hours away.  The boys and I are with my parents.  And we still don't have a house..yet.  An offer has been made; we are playing the waiting game.

And where am I now? At peace.  The yellow house wasn't meant to be.  But this  move, it is *still* God's plan.  I don't know how or why, but even in the midst of all the crazy, unknown, and hard parts of this entire situation, I don't doubt the decision Andrew and I made months ago to take this job.  It's weird, and my friends remind me and agree, that even the road getting there has not been one that has been easy, and I have often times wondered what God was doing, I know that this  move is the right step.  That blessings are waiting for our family in following what we know God has called us to do.  I have had to learn to lean on my faith in a very personal way.  God is not showing us the game play, he is leading us, one play at a time.  I can only believe that His plan is the best, trusting in Him, not the seen.